


Day by Day

by johnyongclub



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Adult Content, Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Blood and Violence, Character Death, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, M/M, Monsters, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Post-Apocalypse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:54:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25285714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/johnyongclub/pseuds/johnyongclub
Summary: During the Invasion, the stars exploded, the sun met the moon, the worlds ended.Taeyong and his supposed enemy, Johnny Suh, of the day world, joined forces to rescue their brothers and bring them home.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 7
Kudos: 32





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> hellooooo. im back with a chaptered fic and since we all know how bad i am with chaptered fics, here's hoping i go through with this and actually finish it. this is a spinoff to my sebaek fic called day & night but you don't need to read that to understand this as i'll be describing everything in depth.
> 
> it probably won't be very long, possibly six chapters or so!! thank you in advance if you choose to read and walk this journey with me.
> 
> this is proofread by nisha my bby and flav, thank you ❤
> 
> on a side note, here are terms you'll find throughout this work that might need explaining:
> 
>  **Glares** = what nightwalkers call the daywalkers  
>  **Vaela** = an organization run by a group of nightwalkers  
>  **Maeve** = another organization  
>  **Sitara** = sun-infected night walkers
> 
> there will be more in later chapters!

It's eerie, looking at the stretch of field that was once a beautiful garden of tulips, now barren and dead. The grass stopped growing, as if all the blood shed upon the ground soaked into the soil made them recoil, refusing to spurt life on such a filthy land. 

Taeyong wonders if he would have loved the tulips. 

The stench is foul, even though the great Invasion had happened years and years ago. The smell of death and blood and fear must have stuck to the air. He wonders, yet again, if his father had been here, on this very land, fighting for their rights.

He wishes he was old enough to miss him, but there is only so much a five year old could remember about a man who was never really home. Instead he remembers growing up without a father and he remembers the day the Glares barged into his home and took his mother away.

The day he was left completely and fearfully alone.

"Hey," A whisper from behind him calls, breaking through the silence and Taeyong turns to find his best friend, Doyoung, shouldering his backpack, ready to go. "We gotta get back before the patrols start around this area. Got everything we need?"

Taeyong nods, picking up his own bag, heavy from the materials and necessities they'd looted just over an hour ago. "We're running low on ammo, though, so we'll have to keep our heads low."

Doyoung acknowledges it with a hum, eyes scanning the area just in case. "Taeil says the Amalgamation starts in a couple hours. We gotta reach Maeve before then or the Glares might catch up with us."

"Or worse," Taeyong adds, moving along to follow Doyoung and the two others that'd gone with them for tonight's scavenge. "The fucking Vaelas."

This makes Doyoung laugh but it sounds tired. Taeyong knows how that feels. This is an endless cycle; tomorrow another group of scavengers will leave the village to raid abandoned buildings far off from the town to find supplies and then it would be their turn again. Sometimes, Taeyong doesn't get to go with Doyoung. He hates those.

It isn't a typical night, however, and Taeyong knows why. It's merge night, which means the nightwalkers would experience the sun for the next three days just as the daywalkers, or the Glares, as he prefers it, would experience night. 

This has gone on for the rest of history. He has never read anything about day and night coming together. It is always day or it is always night. He is of the moon, a son born in the night. Somewhere on the other side, another son was born in the day. 

Every full moon, day and night would coexist; twelve hours of day followed by twelve hours of night. It would go on for three whole days and it would be the longest three days one could experience. 

Taeyong has never liked the sun, and the walkers that come with the rise of it. He doesn't, however, know if it was because the Glares had been the one that started the war some twenty years ago or if it was because he saw one of them end his mother's life. Maybe both, he thinks. That would make sense.

When the sun rises in the morning,  _ morning _ ; something he doesn't get to say often, the Glares would roam the streets and nightwalkers such as himself would be scarce because their strength is the moon. That, and the fact that Glares would not spare their lives if they were to bump into each other.

There was peace once, he knows that much. He never lived through it but he knows, from the stories they told, that before this, there was peace. There was an Amalgamation ritual for the descendants of the ruling houses, right on that tulip field, where nightwalkers bowed to Glares to welcome them into the night. 

He knows that there were a pair of lovers from different worlds that had been the true cause to the war. He knows that during the Invasion, the stars exploded, the sun met the moon, the worlds ended. 

And then there were him and his found family, surviving each night battling against an entire group of nightwalkers of a different belief; the Vaelas.

It hasn't been easy. It was easy when he was two, three, four, but it hasn't been since he was five.

Now as they make their way using the hidden routes through the city, Taeyong could almost feel the heat of the sun that would make its appearance during the merge. He heard the merge is beautiful, but none has witnessed it save for the ruling families.

Almost all of them are dead now. Almost.

They're walking through the underground tunnel when they hear footsteps and hushed murmurs, a sign that they are not alone.

"Heads up," Doyoung whispers in warning, causing Taeyong and the two others, Dejun and Jaemin, to stop midstep, immediately crouching to keep their heads down.

Taeyong gestures for them to hide into the built-in tunnel that would shield them from view, peeking his head out to get a proper look on who the strangers could be. It'd be hard to see in the dark if he wasn't born in the night, eyes adjusted to the dim light and easily spotting two males from afar.

He squints to see better, recognizing the star symbol on the shoulders of the men he's watching.

"Vaelas," He whispers to the others. There are only two of them in sight so it'd be easy to take them down or move past them unnoticed. 

He's about to move when Doyoung stops him with a hand curled around his wrist. "We don't know how many of them there are. And we're low on ammo, remember? There's only four of us."

Taeyong purses his lips, turning back to look at the Vaelas lurking not too far from them. Doyoung is right, of course. If there are more of them, they won't make it home in one piece. 

"How about Tunnel Estra?" Dejun voices out, barely a whisper. "They're blocking our only way out and we're outnumbered. I think we can risk a little and take that route?"

Taeyong considers this but Doyoung beats him to it. "It's too dangerous. We don't know what's residing in Estra. It could be worse than the Vaelas."

"The Vaelas aren't gonna let us die quickly, Doyoung," Jaemin intercepts, fear crystal clear in his voice. "I'd rather be stuck in Estra forever than get caught. They'd make our lives a living hell."

The voices grow closer and Taeyong tenses up, his fight or flight senses kicking in. He thinks about the younger boys. Dejun and Jaemin are still too young, even though they are adults and Taeyong could never, would never, risk their lives falling in the hands of the Vaelas. 

"They're right," He says finally, speaking to Doyoung. "If we're going to die, we won't die in the hands of these scumbags, Doyoung. Let's go."

Doyoung doesn't get enough time to consider it because the shadows are closing in and Taeyong moves on instinct. He guides them away from the Vaelas, back to the entrance of the tunnel and out without wasting another second. 

They move in silence, sticking to the walls until they reach the entrance of Tunnel Estra. Its entrance is blocked but poorly so, leaving an opening big enough for them to slip through. 

Inside, it's dark. Darker than what their eyes are accustomed to and aided by the flashlight Doyoung turns on to see where they're going. 

It's one thing to know the enemy you're facing, to know their tactics and the weapons they'd carry. It's another to go in blind. He's heard rumors of what could possibly be lurking in these shut-out tunnels but no one's ever gone through them and made it out alive. Perhaps it isn't the brightest idea.

"Hey," Dejun whispers but in the silence, his voice echoed anyway. "Is there any way to tell my mom that I died bravely if we don't get past the exit?"

Doyoung clicks his tongue. "Don't speak that way. We'll be fine. These are shorter routes back to Maeve, I'm sure we'll be home in no time."

They fall into another silence, one that Taeyong appreciates. Noise makes him antsy; he's used to blending in and becoming one with the night, unseen and unheard. Too much noise would give away his position and he never wants to be found.

He stays on alert, glad that he hadn't hung anything on his backpack that would make too much noise. He's wearing a black hoodie topped with a navy blue bomber jacket to keep himself warm, shoulders carrying the heavy backpack he's never without. 

The rest of them are dressed similarly. It's essential that they do, seeing as they have to be prepared by whatever they might come into contact with. The Vaelas are nightwalkers just as they are, but their beliefs go beyond Taeyong could comprehend and it makes sense, for a group of people that follows a leader who has so much resentment, after having witnessed the Invasion that destroyed the world.

In a way, Taeyong could relate. The one who leads Vaela wants to kill every daywalker there is and to some extent, Taeyong wants that too, but he could never see himself living within a family whose only purpose is to kill. 

"Did you hear that?" Jaemin stops them, prompting Taeyong to focus, straining his ears to listen. 

The sound is faint, but it's there. Taeyong gestures for the rest of them to follow, creeping against the wall of the tunnel to blend in. The sound comes again, a little louder this time. It's similar to a growl, like a cat when it has food in its mouth and trying to keep it to itself, so no one could steal its food. 

"Oh my god," Dejun whispers, his voice shaking and Taeyong turns to look at what's gotten Dejun so shaken up and what he sees has his eyes widening in shock. 

It's a shadow more than anything, looming above them in its monstrous size. It has no facial features but the aura it carries scares Taeyong to his bones and his first instinct is to run. No weapon they have would be able to kill it.

"Go," He says to Dejun and then repeats it a little louder. "Go! To the exit!"

They run. 

Taeyong makes sure Dejun and Jaemin go first and then Doyoung. He knows within his heart that he'd be the last the monster would want to have. He knows he's  _ marked _ . He's a shield, and that is why he offers to go out of their camp every night, to make sure the rest comes home safe.

The shadow creeps along the walls in the chase. Dejun, Jaemin and Doyoung don't turn back, their legs carrying them away, towards the barred exit. Taeyong runs with his heart in his throat, turning to find the shadow coming too close. 

They're stopped at the end of the tunnel, Doyoung hurriedly lifting one of the debris that's barring the exit. Taeyong panics, fear rising in his throat and he's washed with a sense of protectiveness, overwhelmed by the urge to keep his friends alive. 

Dejun has barely just slipped through the opening and the shadow is closing in. Taeyong's heart races against his chest, urging Jaemin to go fast but the shadow is so close and Taeyong acts on instinct.

He turns around, holds out his palms and the scream that leaves him doesn't sound like him at all. 

The shadow screeches just as a stream of blinding white light shoots out Taeyong's palms and then he sees nothing else but white. White everywhere.

* * *

"A  _ light conjurer _ ?!" Doyoung asks, head whipping around to look at Taeyong.

Taeyong doesn't look up to meet his gaze, keeping his eyes on his calloused fingers, eyeing the chipped nails on each of his digits. He assumes Doyoung would be upset. They had been friends since they were children and Taeyong had never once mentioned that he was… Well, different. 

It happened the day his mother was killed, the Amalgamation night the Invasion happened, when the Glares appeared in the field and declared war, killing every civilian of the night, Taeyong's mother included. 

He'd cried over her body, five years old and beyond afraid and lost. Everyone he knew were dead around him, bodies strewn across the streets as the world erupted into chaos. When he had looked up at the sky, it wasn't night and it wasn't morning and the sun was facing the moon and the stars exploded. 

He did not see the sun meet the moon but he felt it when the lightning struck and his arm burned. He did not see because then the world turned white and he was blinded. 

When he had woken up again, he was in a hospital bed in a dark room, the only thing stopping him from crying was the fact that the woman with him was Doyoung's mother, who is a doctor. On his arm, right upon the curve of his elbow where the lightning had burned him, sits a mark the shape of a crescent moon. 

"How long have you guys known this?" Doyoung asks Taeil, who is the only one who knows about Taeyong because he leads their group.

Being leader, Taeil also has been the one that escorts Taeyong to and from the main camp, where their entire community's leader resides. There, Taeyong had been kept under close supervision, so they could learn of his abilities and weaknesses.

He hates it. He hates it because they are merciless. He hates it because they threw him into a dark pit only to see if the soul-eating monsters still feast on him. They didn't because of the mark on his arm, but still, at ten years old, Taeyong was afraid.

"No one else knows but the council," Taeil explains just as Jaehyun, their medical staff member holds up the flashlight to check Taeyong's pupils. Taeil continues, "And I really hope you, Jaemin and Dejun will keep this to yourselves. It's for Taeyong's safety."

Taeyong looks up to see Doyoung pursing his lips. Their eyes meet for a second but Doyoung is quick to look away. Taeyong turns again to find Jaehyun watching him. His smile is kinder but also apologetic and understanding; Taeyong knows it's because Jaehyun would have to do his own explanation to his boyfriend, Doyoung. 

"What has the council been doing with this info?" Doyoung asks. Taeyong looks at Taeil to see if he would be honest, if he knew what the council does.

Taeil purses his lips, looking away from Taeyong. "I can't say it's good. I don't know what they do but I know enough that it's not all good."

"It's not good at all," Taeyong finally speaks up, knowing he can trust these three men. He keeps his voice low, in case anyone else is listening. "Seven years old, tossed into a fucking Sitara enclosure, expected to defend myself."

Doyoung looks mortified as he steps closer, listening. "Taeyong…"

Taeyong doesn't falter. It's time he was honest with Doyoung anyway. If anyone should know, it's his own best friend. He feels nothing now, not the fear he felt then, not the pain he suffered. A normal nightwalker wouldn't have survived when bit by a Sitara, a creature that used to be a person, left stranded too long under the sun during the Invasion, when morning came for an entire week instead of the usual three days in the month.

"There were three of them," Taeyong continues. "One came and bit me and it just… It just died. It screamed and it died. Like my blood is poison, like my skin burned it."

The silence that follows after is heavy so Taeyong adds with a little laugh. "They were so happy about it they let me eat good food for a whole week."

Doyoung joins in this time, snickering. "Was that when you snuck a whole boiled chicken for us to eat?"

When Taeyong nods, they share a smile. He knows he's forgiven then. He still remembers it to this night; he'd had no other family but Doyoung and Jaehyun and a bunch of them kids. So when he was left alone he'd carried the boiled chicken to their little hut and shared it, all ten of them and one whole chicken. It was a good memory. 

"Are they still making use of your blood?" Jaehyun asks then, always curious. He'd grown up learning within the medical field, guided by Doyoung's mother herself. 

Taeyong shrugs. "I know they have samples and maybe bags of them. But have we been given anything that'll keep us immune from Sitaras? I don't think so."

"Maybe they're just keeping it so the Vaelas or Glares won't find out we have something to protect us from the creatures." Taeil inputs.

With a sigh, Taeyong hops off the hospital bed he's been perched on while Jaehyun checked on him. He goes to put on his jacket, hands in the pockets. "I think it's selfish. If my life meant something then I'd like for it to be able to protect my people. But I have no say in it."

"Where are you going?" Doyoung asks, "Shouldn't you be resting?"

"I need some air," Taeyong says, raising a hand to wave off Doyoung from following him. "I'll be fine, I promise. I'll see you later."

Doyoung knows when not to push so Taeyong is glad he doesn't follow him out of the room. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Maeve was found two months after the Invasion, by a doctor who was leading the group Taeyong was in when Doyoung's mother, Dr. Sohee, took him under her care. Not many of them get the chance to personally speak to Dr. Sun, but Taeyong has always been special. 

The many experiments and medical checkups they did on him allowed him time with Dr. Sun and most of those times, she would come down to personally explain to him about what they plan to do.

She is a moon child despite her name but even through her kind smiles and constant reminders that she's protecting him, all Taeyong would remember is the fact that they had left him to die by believing in chance that he would survive it. 

Still, he knows even with his resentment that the Vaelas wouldn't be any kinder. If they knew of him, Taeyong doubts he'd be able return home safely. 

The home in question, really, isn't a place. Maeve is family even if the council and its founder is not. Family is Doyoung, who has been his friend since even before the Invasion. Family is Yuta, Ten, Dejun and Jaemin, who go out every night with Taeyong and risk their lives to keep the family fed.

Family is Jaehyun, who checks on them unprompted whenever they get home after a night of scavenging and Mark, who has spent most of his life studying the routes and secret passageways for them to get in and out of Maeve. Family is everyone who contributes to providing a quality life in the aftermath of the end of the world. 

Family is Yangyang, who Taeyong had taken under his wing and cared for like the little brother he never had, who is the only one who could make Taeyong smile even during the darkest of days. 

Dr. Sun and her council that runs Maeve aren't family, Taeyong has long known that. It's the people that are, and he stays for them.

They'd settled in an abandoned village and built it into a home for the people of Maeve, far enough away from the field where the Amalgamation takes place to protect themselves from the Glares. The Vaelas' headquarters are on the other side of the field, approximately a day's travel from Maeve on foot. Most of the Vaelas don't come too close. 

Taeyong steps out of the house he and Yangyang shared now with his jacket off and the hood of his hoodie pulled back, for once. The merge must have occurred about an hour or so ago, if the way the sky is lighter is any indication. 

He looks up at the dark clouds, starless as always. The streets of the village are poorly lit, but it's enough to give it life and not make it seem abandoned. He passes by shophouses, small businesses that opened up to keep their lives going. 

In Maeve, everyone knows Taeyong so everywhere he turns there would be a familiar face greeting him. A nod here, a little wave there. 

"Taeyong," A boy he knows as Vernon nods at him in greeting before his focus returns to the map laid out on the table. 

Taeyong steps closer to take a look, eyeing the map he knows he'd be handed soon. He knows Vernon works with Mark in this area along with a few others, scouting and scouring places undiscovered to add to the map for when Taeyong and the team scavenge. 

"Heard about you guys going into Estra," Vernon says, his voice low. There's an amused smile on his lips. When Taeyong raises a brow in question because he didn't think Vernon was supposed to know, the half caucasian boy shrugs. "We've been sworn to silence, don't worry. We only know you guys went in, not whatever that might be in it."

Taeyong scoffs, relieved to know that no one else knows about what he is. "Yeah, some things best left unknown."

Vernon nods, mirroring his scoff. "You're telling me. Dejun looks pretty shaken up. Mark and I are going after sundown to make sure it's barred again."

_ Right _ , Taeyong thinks.  _ Sundown. _ No matter how many times he'd lived through the merge, Taeyong thinks he'd never get used to the sun. He looks up at the sky again and thinks about how it'd be lit up and blue once the sun is up. 

"Did you see Yangyang?" Taeyong asks, running his fingers through his black hair to push it back. 

Vernon gestures towards the stables. "Saw him heading there earlier."

Taeyong offers him a smile then. "Thanks, Vernon. Take care tonight. Bring Mark home in one piece, yeah?"

"Doing my best, Tae," Vernon laughs, waving him off as Taeyong walks away.

There are few others that greet him as he makes his way towards the stables. They run a pretty small farm to sustain life, although there's always more wheat and vegetables than meat. Horses are used for when they travel far but that's rare. 

He finds Yangyang grooming his personal favorite mare when he steps into the stables, a fond smile forming on his lips at the sight. They're only five years apart but Taeyong dotes on the boy as if he was much younger. Yangyang complains, sometimes, but it doesn't stop Taeyong.

Having Yangyang to care about feels too close to having an actual meaning to his life, so he does.

"How long have you been out here?" He speaks up, causing the younger boy to turn his head and look at him. "The sun will be up soon."

This gets Yangyang's attention. "How soon?"

Taeyong lifts his shoulders. "Two hours, maybe. Why? Are you planning to watch the sunrise?"

Yangyang laughs. There's a single wheat he bites between his teeth, a habit he'd picked up to stop himself from chewing on his nails instead. Taeyong smiles, feeling fond as he steps closer and caresses the horse's jaw, petting gently. 

When Yangyang speaks again, what he says leaves Taeyong speechless. "Let's go away."

"Go away?" Taeyong frowns. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm tired of this place," Yangyang continues. It's only then that Taeyong notices the full backpack resting against the side, that Yangyang is preparing the horse for a ride instead of simply grooming her. 

Taeyong purses his lips, panic making his heart beat wildly. "Where would you even go? This is home, Yang. And the moon is full. There'd be Glares and Vaelas everywhere."

"I don't care," Yangyang sighs, patting the horse once more. "I'm tired of this life. I wanna see places. I can fight them, Taeyong. I'm not scared."

"You should be," Taeyong snaps, stepping a little closer. He tries to stay calm but he's feeling increasingly desperate. "Yang, listen to me, okay? Maeve is home. We're safe here. We have food and we have shelter. We have family. There's nothing out there but death."

Yangyang is silent now, refusing to meet Taeyong's gaze but staring at the floor, at his own pair of feet. He keeps his voice low when he speaks again. "You sound just like the council."

Taeyong's lips part, ready to defend himself but he shuts them as soon as he realized Yangyang was right. He tries to calm his breathing, looking up to look at the horse, looking just as restless as he feels.

"Will you stay?" He asks, quiet.

The younger boy shrugs. "Can't leave you, can I?"

Taeyong forces a smile upon his lips. He pulls Yangyang into his arms and squeezes him, willing him to stay even though he doesn't ask it verbally. He doesn't let go. 

"You're all I have," Taeyong tells him in a little whisper, hating just how vulnerable he feels. His eyes squeeze shut as he tightens his grip, pulling back with a hand curled around Yangyang's nape. "You're all I fucking have, Yang."

They share another silence. Yangyang nods his head and Taeyong gives his shoulder another squeeze. 

"Wanna watch the sunrise together?" He tries, even though Yangyang's rejection is apparent.

"I think I'm gonna spend some time with Taehee," The boy says softly, patting the horse's neck. 

Taeyong nods again, lips pursed, something he's so used to doing because it never fails to hide his true emotions. He couldn't help but feel like the conversation could have gone better and he stays rooted in his spot, finding the words to say until he realizes there is nothing left.

He claps Yangyang's shoulder with another nod of his head, another forced smile. "I'll see you around."

Turning back, he doesn't spare Yangyang another glance, afraid that he would do something he would regret, like making sure the boy comes with him. A voice tells him to be wary, to keep watch, but the bigger part of him knows he has to trust his brother.

Even if it means he would lose him.

* * *

The dreams came in flashing lights this time, and the monster from Estra made an appearance. It didn't die under Taeyong's light, instead it ate them whole. All four of them. Gone, forever.

It isn't a rare occurrence; Taeyong has had these dreams ever since he could remember. Usually he would see the sun rising and the moon wavering, the stars collide and burst in tinkles. When he'd told Dr. Sun this, she tells him he's witnessing the beauty of the Amalgamation in his dreams. 

They're longer on merge nights, these nightmares, and they feel real. Almost as if he was back on that field, watching as day comes to meet night before it leaves again. In those, there is never anyone else.

Taeyong is always alone. 

He wakes with a start when the monster in Estra screeches in his dreams, gasping as his eyes fly open, trying to recognize his surroundings. Sweat seeps down his temples as he tries hard to even his breathing. He takes a look around him and exhales in relief; he's home, he's safe.

The second thing he notices is the stream of sunlight peeking through the creak of his window. He sits up from his bed and walks over to the window, careful to slowly take a peek outside. 

He squints immediately, his eyes taking the time to adjust to the bright light. There's that usual dreadful feeling that comes with the merge, where his heart weighs twice its size. Taeyong sighs, walking over to the pail of water to freshen up. 

"Yangyang!" He calls out, expecting the younger boy to come padding out of his bedroom. Ten minutes go by and there's still no response. He frowns, abandoning his attempt to make breakfast to check on the boy.

The room is empty when he opens it. Taeyong's first thought is that Yangyang could be in the bathroom but he checks and it's just as empty. Panic settles in his stomach as he goes to look outside, hurriedly stepping down the porch stairs to go out back, to check the shed Yangyang sometimes holes himself in. Nothing. Empty.

His fears come in tumbling waves, washing over him and pulling him down and Taeyong can't breathe. He runs out of his backyard, into the village's center, where it's mostly empty because his people are asleep since the sun is out.

"Yangyang!" He cries out. Once, twice, one more time. People start to look out their windows when they hear his distress. He tries to think of the last he'd seen Yangyang and the memory brings him to the stables. Taehee is gone. His backpack is gone.

This? This feels like one of his nightmares. Taeyong looks frantically around the stables, hoping to find Yangyang there, possibly asleep with Taehee. But Yangyang is  _ gone _ .  _ Yangyang is gone _ .

His breathing start to escalate in rapid inhale and exhale, running out of the stables to look again. He trips on his own shoes, stumbling down onto his knees and it's then that it dawns on him that Yangyang had left.

At some point, Doyoung finds him, arms curling around his heaving form. The panic he feels isn't something everyone else has seen, save for Dr. Sun, who had been the main cause of these attacks. 

"Taeyong, breathe," Doyoung tells him, a hand on each of his shoulder, trying to calm him. "What's going on? Take a deep breath and calm down."

Taeyong  _ tries _ . It isn't easy. It isn't easy to calm down when the sole purpose of his life is gone. His lips part to speak but all he could do is take a huge intake of breath, chest hurting.

He barely notices when a shadow looms over them. When Doyoung steps aside, another familiar face replaces him, crouched down to level with Taeyong. Their gazes meet and Taeyong feels himself break down, bursting into sobs as he allows the male to gather him in his arms.

It's Seokwoo. Seokwoo has been the only one who could calm him in his panic. He's trembling, his sobs chopped up into a messy hiccup, even as Seokwoo cradles him close. 

"Yangyang," He finally managed to say, breaking away from the taller male to look at Doyoung, cheeks damp with tear streaks. "He's gone."


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Night meets day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took too long haha.. this is unbeta-ed. if anyone is reading, do leave a comment and tell me what you think! your comments motivate me a whole lot. thank you~

"You were supposed to guard the gates," Taeyong is saying, arms wound around himself as he stares into space. The accusing tone he's using against Seokwoo isn't fair, he knows that, but who else could he blame but the ones who were standing at the post, the only way in and out of Maeve?

They're gathered now in the main hall Taeil had officially made into a meeting room, after wasting a whole hour trying to calm Taeyong instead of organizing a search party. 

He feels like an idiot for many things; for leaving Yangyang behind even though he knew the boy wanted to leave, for letting himself collapse into Seokwoo's arms while the others watch him be the very thing he doesn't want to be. Vulnerable.

Seokwoo may be a source of comfort but what they had was just that; history. Taeyong hates that sometimes he still pictures the warmth Seokwoo used to give, hates that he'd grown dependent. 

"Did he tell you why he wanted to leave?" Taeil asks, so frustratingly calm. 

Taeyong looks over at the group of them; Taeil, Doyoung, Jaehyun, Yuta, Mark and Seokwoo, all six of them looking at him for the answer. He considers telling them what Yangyang had told him but it feels like spilling a secret he's supposed to protect with his life. He looks away, jaw clenching.

"He promised he wouldn't," Taeyong murmurs. "What if he'd been kidnapped? He wouldn't leave me, not after everything."

Seokwoo shifts his weight onto a different leg, not meeting Taeyong's gaze. "That's just not possible. The gates are closely guarded. No way there'd be any intruder slipping in without us noticing."

"You didn't notice he left either," Taeyong snaps, straightening up from where he'd been leaning against the desk. "If the guard team was paying close attention then they would've caught him."

"Taeyong," Doyoung calls, warning in his voice. Taeyong knows he should stop blaming and pointing fingers but he's angry and upset and he just wants to go and look for Yangyang.

Worry stirs in his belly, his cruel mind picturing the worst. Yangyang may be an adult, but he'd never left the village on his own and he had never killed anyone before. Not a Vaela, not a Glare and certainly not a Sitara or every other creature one would encounter out in the world. Taeyong has seen many and none of which he'd ever want Yangyang to see.

"I have to go and find him," Taeyong says finally, pacing the floor of the room while fiddling with his fingers, something he does when he's nervous. "He's gonna die out there, Taeil. Let me go and find him."

Fortunately, Taeil doesn't need much convincing. He nods but adds, "You can't go alone. Bring at least three with you, Yong. We'll check the perimeter and see if there's been any breach."

"I'll go with you," Doyoung is the first to volunteer, and it doesn't surprise Taeyong. Doyoung has been his partner in their trips out of the village his entire life. He'd pick Doyoung to come with if he had to.

"Me too," Jaehyun says, surprising Doyoung, whose head whips around to face his boyfriend. Jaehyun stands his ground. "I care about Yangyang too."

"No," Doyoung says, simple and curt.

Taeyong has to agree. "Doyoung's right. It's not your field, Jaehyun. It'd be safer for you here."

Jaehyun's about to protest when Yuta steps in, speaking for the first time that morning. "I'll go. We're in and out all the time. If anyone's familiar with the places, it'd be us."

There's rapid knocking at the door in the silent gap that slipped in while they decide who's to go with Taeyong and when Taeil permits the person to come in, Taeyong looks to see that it's Hendery.

"We have a visitor," Hendery tells Taeil but his eyes flicker to Taeyong. "It's about Yangyang."

* * *

Taeyong was the first to fly out the door the moment Yangyang's name left Hendery's mouth, making his way to the gates that kept Maeve safe from the outside. The guards at post are aiming their arrows downwards, directed at who Taeyong assumed must be their visitor. He wonders if it's a Vaela.

Doyoung and Taeil follow him up to the parapet, where about five of Maeve guards stood to keep watch. Taeyong expects to find a Vaela on the other side of the gate but the man he sees looks nothing like a night child.

"A fucking Glare," Doyoung mutters under his breath. 

Taeyong shares his surprise and concern; almost no daywalker had ever ventured this far off from the field, at least since the Invasion. Where once there is double to everything when the merge happened and day and night people coexisted within a community, the war had separated them completely. 

Glares claimed the field and the area surrounding it so nightwalkers steer clear during Amalgamation.

The daywalker stood his ground, seemingly unafraid. He's tall, Taeyong could tell from up here, built like a fighter, not too big but someone Taeyong assumes would be at the front line. His hair, unlike every other Glare Taeyong had ever seen, isn't blonde but black. The only thing that sets him apart from a nightwalker is the melanin in his skin.

Only one exposed to the sun would have skin so golden and glowing like his.

"Who else is with you?" Taeil calls out, loud enough for the daywalker to hear him. "Why are you here?"

The boy moves his arms and immediately the guards pull back their bowstrings, causing the daywalker to put his hands up, palms facing them to show that he came in peace. Taeil signals for them to lower their weapons. Taeyong keeps his eyes on the Glare.

"I'm alone," The boy finally says. His voice, Taeyong thinks, sounds like the trickle of honey. He wonders if sons of the day are blessed with such features. The daywalker speaks again. "I don't mean any harm. I've come here for help."

Doyoung steps forward this time. "I don't think there's anything we can help you with. And even if there is, we don't owe you any favor."

"You mentioned Yangyang?" Taeyong intercepts, wanting to get to the point. When the daywalker looks at him in confusion, Taeyong turns to look at Hendery, who quickly goes to address the Glare.

"You said you saw one of us. Explain."

The daywalker visibly relaxes. "I did. It's why I came. They have- I don't know who they are but they have one of my brothers. They have yours."

"How are you sure they have one of us?" Taeyong presses on, gaze fixated on the boy.

"Had a horse with him. And a bag, had that symbol on it." The Glare points to the gate, where Taeyong knows they'd spray painted their moon symbol. 

It's the information the daywalker has that caught Taeyong's attention. A horse, meaning Taehee, and the backpack must have been the one he'd seen Yangyang put aside at the stable. 

Without wasting another second, Taeyong turns and goes down the steps, signaling for them to open the gate. When the steel bars separate, Taeyong could see the boy clearer. His face carries a charm to it, perfectly sculpted and lower lip plump and pink. He looks almost too perfect to be alive in the ruins of their worlds, as if he'd been polished into perfection.

"If you do so much as hurt one of us," Taeyong says, meeting the boy's gaze. "You'll regret it."

The daywalker nods curtly, showing that he understands. "I'm unarmed. And I'm alone."

Taeyong's jaw clenches before he motions for the male to come forward, into the safe threshold of his home. He knows that if this goes down south, he'd be responsible for bringing in the enemy.

But he'd do anything for Yangyang.

  
  


* * *

  
  


The daywalker introduces himself as Johnny Suh, as if the name of his family meant anything to Taeyong or anyone of them. It doesn't ring a bell but Taeyong keeps it in mind in case it ever comes up.

They'd decided to withhold his presence from the council, as well as Yangyang's disappearance. Taeyong doesn't trust Dr. Sun would care and in any case, she might have Johnny killed. If Johnny is the only lead Taeyong has to find Yangyang, he'd keep Johnny alive as long as he could.

"It must be the Vaelas," Doyoung is saying, an arm wound around his midriff and supporting the other as he rubs his temple with his free hand. They're back in the meeting room, gathered around the war table where the updated map is splayed out. 

Taeyong has his eyes on Johnny, wary and worried at the same time. Each second they lose is another second it takes for whoever it is that has Yangyang to go off track and Taeyong is growing desperate.

If Johnny noticed his staring, he didn't show it. The daywalker keeps his attention on the people that are talking, on Doyoung, who's coming up with his own theories, ones that are making Taeyong increasingly frustrated. 

"What motive would the Vaelas have in kidnapping them?" Yuta asks. "They're more likely to strike the moment they find one of us, especially one of them Glares. This doesn't make sense."

Taeil sighs. "If it's them then they must be heading south now, possibly to the headquarters."

"They went north," Johnny finally speaks up, straightening up from leaning against the wall. "My brother- He went off right after the merge because he was upset and I followed him. That's when I saw them take him. They already had the other boy with them and they went north. Up that hill by the lake."

Taeyong frowns, stepping forward as well. "You didn't think to follow them?"

"And die?" Johnny snaps, for the first time showing an actual emotion. "I'm unarmed. I'm empty-handed. If they see me, they'd kill me. What good is that for my brother? There's a reason I came here for help."

The single, prominent vein on Taeyong's right side of the neck feels like it's about to pop. His jaw clenches and his lips part to speak but Taeil beats him to it. Still, Taeyong and Johnny stare at each other, long and hard. It's Johnny that looks away.

"Now is not the time to butt heads, boys," Taeil reminds them. "I know we come from different places. But it's important to know what our priorities are. We both want the same thing."

Taeyong turns away then, reminded of the fact that the hatred he has towards the Glares goes bone-deep, but also very aware that Yangyang is in grave danger. 

"If it isn't the Vaelas," He speaks up, looking at Taeil. "Who else could it be? We've been searching the place for the past five years. We're the only ones there are besides them."

The room is silent for a moment. Taeyong could hear their minds turning and thinking, coming up with possibilities. His own head feels disconnected, no matter how hard he tries to refocus. Almost as if his brain had melted. For a second, he wonders if they'd all been tricked into believing Johnny. 

Their silence is broken by the static sounds of Taeil's handheld transmitter. He holds up a hand to excuse himself before going to speak to whoever had tried to contact him, leaving the rest of them in the room, tension high in the air. 

"I'm sorry," Johnny says, his voice bringing attention to him from the group of them though it's clear he's speaking to Taeyong. "About your brother. I know how it feels."

For some odd, unexplainable reasons, Johnny's words tick him off in a way he doesn't know how to describe. All he knows is that there is absolutely no way that the daywalker could ever understand it, not if he isn't the only surviving one in his family, not if he didn't witness the death of his own parent.

"You don't," Taeyong says, his tone sharp. "No one knows how it feels."

Just then, Taeil returns, looking exasperated. Taeyong knows in the way that Taeil is looking directly at him that he has something to do with it.

"It's Dr. Sun," Taeil says with a sigh. "She wants to speak to you. In person."

  
  


* * *

  
  


The Maeve headquarters, to no one's surprise, look well-furnished, like an entire city built from the ground up, while its people live off limited crops and farm animals. Even in the world after it's destroyed, the privileged still made sure the barrier between them still very prominently exists. 

Taeyong hates it here. Every corner of this fabricated version of a new world reminds him of pain and fear, every smile directed at him meant to assure him only makes him wary. Dr. Sun's lying face is printed onto each one of her employees, feeding lie after lie to the people who are so eager to believe in hope. Taeyong believes in nothing. 

He's escorted by a guard he doesn't know the name of, walking in silence because he trusts not a single soul beyond the village he lives in, the family he knows. His mind reels with possibilities of what Dr. Sun would want to speak to him about. There's a chance that she already knows about Yangyang's disappearance or worse; Johnny's presence.

There's little that Dr. Sun doesn't know. Taeyong wouldn't put it past her to be unaware.

The only thing he needs to worry about is knowing what to say to give her the impression that he wasn't trying to keep it from her.

The guard leads him to the main building, barely functioning but enough for Dr. Sun to continue her experiments. He's been here too many times to count but they never trust him to go alone.

Inside the elevator, the guard presses the button to the top floor and they wait for a long time until it stops and the door opens to the white expanse of the entire floor. Taeyong notes the familiar faces of Dr. Sun's employees, every one of them too preoccupied with work to notice as he steps out.

He's escorted all the way to Dr. Sun's office, where the guard finally leaves him as soon as he enters the room. Dr. Sun isn't at her seat when he looks around to find her, startling him when the door to the side of the room opens and she strolls in.

She isn't too old as anyone would imagine. Forty years of age, at most, if Taeyong still knows how to recognize these faces according to their ages. Her hair is black, let loose over her shoulders and back. For anyone who hasn't had to see her face growing up, they'd think she has a kind smile. But Taeyong knows her, to a certain extent. She knows all about him but everything he knows about her, he's had to find out himself.

"Taeyong," She greets him with the same, fake smile he'd grown used to over the years. "It's really nice to see you here today. I just thought to check up on you. How has everything been?"

Taeyong shrugs his shoulders. "How much worse can it get?"

Dr. Sun smiles then, lips pressed tightly together. "Taeyong, please know that everything we've done here has been for one purpose, and that is to help you. We've said this many times, haven't we?"

He hates it. He hates the pitch in her voice he knows she uses only when she tries to convince him, hates the smile she's wearing to make it seem as if she's a decent human being. Still, he hides his resentment and hatred inside, hidden from her view.

"Everything's been good," Taeyong lies. He knows she wants to know if his nightmares still come to him. "I've been out of Maeve and back for supplies."

Dr. Sun nods her head, thinking. "What about the dreams? The merge was just a few hours ago. Did you have any?"

He considers telling her, if only it means she would tell him why he had seen the monster in Estra in his dreams, but telling her would mean she would know about the encounter and he doesn't want her to know that. Instead, he shakes his head.

"My sleep was peaceful."

"Huh," She hums, tapping the back of her pen against the surface of her desk in the way that pisses him off. "You haven't had any the past three months."

A lie, because he's had a nightmare every time he sleeps, but Taeyong nods. "They just stopped."

"Do you think anything might have caused the sudden change?"

"Maybe I'm just happier now," Taeyong says, holding the doctor's steely gaze as he speaks. "Maybe they stopped coming because I'm at peace."

"It can't be—" She starts but Taeyong interrupts.

"Why is that? Is the idea of me being happy an impossibility?"

Dr. Sun smiles again, shaking her head. "You've misunderstood me, Taeyong. Of course your happiness is more than possible. It's just that I didn't expect for the nightmares to stop without a cause. Tell me, Taeyong, you have been honest with me, haven't you?"

Taeyong pauses. He knows he shouldn't put up with his cold responses in case Dr. Sun gets suspicious and uses force to get him to cooperate so Taeyong nods again, schooling his face to wear a much softer expression. "I would never lie to you, doctor."

The doctor's smile isn't as convincing but luckily for Taeyong, she doesn't ask anymore questions. Instead, she rises to her feet and he mirrors her, getting off his seat and waiting for her permission for him to leave. He waits, but she merely walks off towards the extension of her office, opening the door and then turning to gesture him forward.

This is bad, Taeyong thinks. He is supposed to be heading back to the village and find Yangyang and if Dr. Sun plans to run another test on him, it would take forever. It could be too late.

"Where are you taking me?" He asks gingerly.

The doctor smiles, meant to reassure. "You know by now I don't run any tests on you without prior notice to prepare you mentally, Taeyong. I would just like to show you something."

Taeyong considers this; to decline would rouse her suspicion but to accept would cost him time. In the end, he nods, stepping forward and following her into the other room. 

He hasn't been in this part of her office. It's different from everywhere else in the building. Instead of white walls and white furniture and bright lights, this one is darker. The lights are dimmed and the walls a light shade of gray. Taeyong stands in the middle of the doorway, staring into the room and waiting for her to lead the way.

When she does, he follows her inside. It's darker as they go further in and he wonders how much deeper the room would take them and just how big her room extension would be. The walls are decorated with wall lamps, low in brightness to allow some light in their path. There are nothing else but those lights, hung at every two meters or so.

It feels like a whole five minutes had passed until the doctor stops, prompting Taeyong to do the same. He watches her and waits for an instruction, for her to say something, anything but for a moment, there is only silence. 

"Will you stand a little closer to the yellow line, Taeyong?" She finally says and only then does Taeyong notice the yellow tape lining horizontally across the room, like a border between here and the other side. When he doesn't move, she speaks again. "Nothing to be afraid of. Go on."

The gut feeling in his chest screams at him not to do so but Taeyong has spent nearly his entire life listening to Dr. Sun's voice, it's almost instinct by now that he would do as she says. 

He steps forward, closer to the border, his heart beating loud and fast against his chest. Beyond the yellow line, there is only pitch black of nothingness. The light only shines on the few inches of carpeted flow beyond the border, fading into darkness.

The mark on his elbow itches at first and then it stings, like getting poked with a needle. He hisses, a hand reaching up to rub at the spot but as he does, the pain grows, slowly but a tenfold. 

"What the fuck?" He panics, and he's about to turn around and ask the doctor when he hears the familiar screech he'd heard before. 

Looking into the darkness, Taeyong could barely hear the growl coming his way. It is exactly the one that he'd heard in Tunnel Estra, with Dejun and Jaemin and Doyoung, where they had run for their lives and his mark had saved them. 

He steps back as the sound grows louder, louder until suddenly the same, horrifying shadow of the monster bursts from within the black nothingness, causing Taeyong to stumble and fall upon his back, trying with all his might to scoot away from it.

"Don't be afraid, Taeyong," The doctor says again. He looks at her and it's that moment that the monster disappears again, back into its darkness. 

Taeyong is breathing hard, so hard his chest is hurting but he takes Dr. Sun's hand when she offers it, using it as leverage to get back onto his feet.

"How'd y- What was that?" He asks.

The doctor smiles, guiding him away from the place and back towards where they'd entered as she explains. "That is a Penumbra. It is a shadow, long in existence within the tunnels and dark places. You can never find one where there is light."

He lets her words register, though it's proven difficult, with the way he is still recovering from the shock. The mark on his elbow throbs but it's dull, faint. "How did you capture it?"

"Why, thanks to you, of course." Dr. Sun laughs just as they reach the door, where she opens it and gestures for him to step outside. 

Taeyong frowns. "Thanks to me?"

The doctor smiles, something sinister. "We know you encountered it in Tunnel Estra during your last scavenge trip, Taeyong. We know everything."

  
  


* * *

  
  


When Taeyong gets back to the village, shaken and upset, he finds Johnny, Seokwoo and Mark already prepared, ready to leave without him. If anything, it fuels his frustration and anger, shooting both Mark and Seokwoo a glare and completely disregarding the daywalker's existence as he packs up.

He doesn't bring much, shoving only his torch and weapons to keep himself armed, as well as the map in case they get stuck somewhere he's never been before. He doesn't say a word as he shoulders his backpack, walking past Taeil and Doyoung, who catches up with him, which isn't a surprise.

"Taeyong," Doyoung says, successfully stopping Taeyong from walking off. "Be careful. You have three days before it's up and if you're on the different side of land, you could get stuck in the day world. You know how long we'd survive there."

Taeyong clenches his jaw, nodding. "I know, Doyoung. I don't care. I don't care as long as Yangyang gets home. You won't see me until I find him."

"Then I'm going with you," Doyoung insists. 

He considers this, lips parted to stop Doyoung but he's the one person Taeyong trusts now and he could use his company. He nods, lips pursed. "Quickly. I don't want it to be too late."

Doyoung doesn't waste time as he goes to pack, lightly as Taeyong did. He watches as his best friend and Jaehyun embrace, share a kiss and he hopes it wouldn't be the last time. His own fingers are still shaking from what had happened at the headquarter and he swallows as he clenches his fists to stop them from trembling. 

He had gone through many experiments, survived different kinds of monsters, yet the one time he faced the shadow, Taeyong couldn't shake off the fear and unsettling feeling in his chest. There was something terrible and unexplainable, even if he did survive what could have been a tragic event.

As Mark and Seokwoo lead the way, Taeyong glances over at the Glare, who's armed with a weapon he knows Taeil had lended to him since he had come unarmed. He's still dressed in the clothes he had appeared in, a black shirt underneath and a long, brown coat. He isn't dressed appropriately for combat should there be one but Taeyong thinks he wouldn't need any help in that area. 

They bid Taeil and Jaehyun goodbye at the gate but Taeyong doesn't linger, the first one to head out further into the woods without turning back. Too many goodbyes would feel too much like a final one and Taeyong never liked goodbyes. 

His mind is otherwise preoccupied; Yangyang is out there with people he doesn't know of and the chances of them being the Vaelas are up there and only god knows what the Vaelas do to daywalkers and nightwalkers alike. If he doesn't get to Yangyang in time… 

Taeyong shakes his head as if it would help get rid of such thoughts. Yangyang is family to him, like Doyoung and Jaehyun are. He couldn't imagine what it'd be like to lose the one person he considers a brother, someone he met growing up and decided to take under his wing. Taeyong doesn't always let fear take hold but right now he's never been so scared.

They walk in silence, following Mark and Seokwoo's lead through quiet streets towards where Johnny claims to have seen the group of people. Taeyong's head is starting to pound in the subtle, dull way that beats against his temples and he feels nauseous, a mix of anxiety and anger over the situation. 

He feels as though everything has been thrown unto him all at once. Dr. Sun and possibly the entire leading group of Maeve may have something they're keeping a secret and there's a nagging feeling at the back of his head that tells him he and his found family might be gravely affected. That and the fact that Yangyang had decided to leave so suddenly when he had never expressed the need to.

"What would you do if we're too late?" A voice disrupts the quiet peace Taeyong was appreciating and he looks up to see that Johnny is now walking next to him, eyes far-away and a mirror image of how Taeyong feels. 

He doesn't know to be bothered over the fact that Johnny is voicing out the very question that was haunting him or sympathize with the mutual feeling of loss and hopelessness. He parts his lips but couldn't find the words to say. Instead he swallows and he stares ahead into the stretch of road, wondering where Yangyang could be.

What  _ would _ he do? Yangyang is important to him and every day he'd woken up with one purpose and that is to make sure Yangyang lives. What would he do if they were too late?

Up front, Seokwoo turns his head and their eyes meet. Taeyong tries to find concern in the brown pair but he could only find the ugly green of jealousy, presumably from seeing Taeyong walking alongside a Glare. Their story goes way back and while Seokwoo was once someone Taeyong trusted with his life, things have changed and now he couldn't shake off the paranoia that he could trust nobody.

Taeyong clenches his jaw and glances over at the daywalker, someone he never would have thought he would work with. Johnny is almost as tall as Seokwoo is but his honey eyes are kinder and in them Taeyong couldn't ignore the unmistakable sign of worry he feels deep in his bones. 

"We won't be." He mutters quietly. "We'll find them."

_ We will _ , Taeyong thinks.  _ We have to. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> promising myself that i will not abandon this story.

**Author's Note:**

> if you have any questions, you can find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/johnyongclub) or [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/johnyongclub)! i'd very much appreciate any feedback, thank you ~


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